The world has changed, since last I looked on it. The trees are different now; maybe greener, maybe fuller, maybe happier. The water--it slurps cheerfully along its swollen river banks and tows the winter's casualties with it. The earth crumbles and pastes, instead of stiffly yielding spittle of rock and ice and dust.

perhaps it is just me that has changed. perhaps it is just my world which has turned upside down.

Because I am leaving once more. Am I not always leaving? Am I not forever saying "goodbye, it was nice knowing you, you are dead to me now?" But this time will be different. This time, I will come back to what I know to be dead to me. This time, I will return and live in the emotional decay and graveyard of people I have already resigned myself to leaving and never looking back to--and even one person, whose memory's gravestone I will visit every time I do anything I love in this city. One person who can never live again, whom I cannot afford to give life to, whom I have no choice but to bid farewell, forever and goodbye.

I had my last dance tonight. It was good. It left me missing. I will not bury this one thing. I may put the others aside in a tight little box, all secured against the unsteady tide of reaction, but this one I will leave in peace, as it left me peaceful.

Or as peaceful as a world turned on its axis ever can be.

Can I just sleep now, please?